Jake liked his women the way he liked his kiwi fruit: sweet yet tart, firm-fleshed yet yielding to the touch, and covered with short brown fuzzy hair.
Jonathan S. Haas
Jealousy is the only vice that gives no pleasure.
Anonymous
Jimmy Carter as President is like Truman Capote marrying Dolly Parton. The job is just too big for him.
Rich Little
Journalism consists largely in saying "Lord Jones died" to people who never knew Lord Jones was alive.
G. K. Chesterton
Just because a dress is red satin doesn't mean it will come off easily.
Anonymous
Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless.
Thomas Edison
Just buy a box of popcorn and a Coca-Cola and sit back and watch.
James Carville
, Clinton advisor, offering advice for Democrats on the term-limits vote in the House
