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 :: 1947-, American Journalist

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Social Security is a government program with a constituency made up of the old, the near old and those who hope or fear to grow old. After 215 years of trying, we have finally discovered a special interest that includes 100 percent of the population. Now we can vote ourselves rich.
~ P. J. O'Rourke - [Welfare]

 

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The government is huge, stupid, greedy and makes nosy, officious and dangerous intrusions into the smallest corners of life -- this much we can stand. But the real problem is that government is boring. We could cure or mitigate the other ills Washington visits on us if we could only bring ourselves to pay attention to Washington itself. But we cannot.
~ P. J. O'Rourke - [Government]

 

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The principle feature of American liberalism is sanctimoniousness. By loudly denouncing all bad things -- war and hunger and date rape -- liberals testify to their own terrific goodness. More important, they promote themselves to membership in a self-selecting elite of those who care deeply about such things. It's a kind of natural aristocracy, and the wonderful thing about this aristocracy is that you don't have to be brave, smart, strong or even lucky to join it, you just have to be liberal.
~ P. J. O'Rourke - [Liberals]

 

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There's no telling what might have happened to our defense budget if Saddam Hussein hadn't invaded Kuwait that August and set everyone gearing up for World War II. Can we count on Saddam Hussein to come along every year and resolve our defense-policy debates? Given the history of the Middle East, it's possible.
~ P. J. O'Rourke - [Defense]

 

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When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.
~ P. J. O'Rourke - [Congress]

 

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You can't get rid of poverty by giving people money.
~ P. J. O'Rourke - [Poverty and The Poor]

 

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