“Never have children, only grand children.”
“A narcissist is someone better looking than you are.”
“Some writers take to drink, others take to audiences.”
“Never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.”
“Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies.”
“I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.”
“All in all, I would not have missed this century for the world.”
“There is something about a bureaucrat that does not like a poem.”
“Style is knowing who you are, what to say, and not giving a damn.”
“I'm all for bringing back the birch, but only between consenting adults.”
“Writing fiction has become a priestly business in countries that have lost their faith.”
“A talent for drama is not a talent for writing, but is an ability to articulate human relationships.”
“Half of the American people never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half.”
“It makes no difference whom you vote for -- the two parties are really one party representing four percent of the people.”
“Democracy is supposed to give you the feeling of choice, like Painkiller X and Painkiller Y. But they're both just aspirin.”
“In America, the race goes to the loud, the solemn, the hustler. If you think you're a great writer, you must say that you are.”
“Apparently, a democracy is a place where numerous elections are held at great cost without issues and with interchangeable candidates.”
“Many writers who choose to be active in the world lose not virtue but time, and that stillness without which literature cannot be made.”
“On 16 September 1985, when the Commerce Department announced that the United States had become a debtor nation, the American Empire died.”
“It is the spirit of the age to believe that any fact, no matter how suspect, is superior to any imaginative exercise, no matter how true.”
“The theater needs continual reminders that there is nothing more debasing than the work of those who do well what is not worth doing at all.”
“To a man, ornithologists are tall, slender, and bearded so that they can stand motionless for hours, imitating kindly trees, as they watch for birds.”
“Sex is. There is nothing more to be done about it. Sex builds no roads, writes no novels and sex certainly gives no meaning to anything in life but itself.”
“There is no such thing as a homosexual or a heterosexual person. There are only homo -- or heterosexual acts. Most people are a mixture of impulses if not practices.”
“Think of the earth as a living organism that is being attacked by billions of bacteria whose numbers double every forty years. Either the host dies, or the virus dies, or both die.”
“If most men and women were forced to rely upon physical charm to attract lovers, their sexual lives would be not only meager but in a youth-worshiping country like America painfully brief.”
“I find in most novels no imagination at all. They seem to think the highest form of the novel is to write about marriage, because that's the most important thing there is for middle-class people.”
“The corporate grip on opinion in the United States is one of the wonders of the Western World. No First World country has ever managed to eliminate so entirely from its media all objectivity -- much less dissent.”
“Laughing at someone else is an excellent way of learning how to laugh at oneself; and questioning what seem to be the absurd beliefs of another group is a good way of recognizing the potential absurdity of many of one's own cherished beliefs.”
“As societies grow decadent, the language grows decadent, too. Words are used to disguise, not to illuminate, action: you liberate a city by destroying it. Words are to confuse, so that at election time people will solemnly vote against their own interests”