Who said “Tea, though ridiculed by those who are naturally coarse in their nervous sensibilities…”?

“Is there no Latin word for Tea? Upon my soul, if I had known that I would have let the vulgar stuff alone.”

“Tea! Thou soft, thou sober, sage, and venerable liquid, thou innocent pretence for bringing the wicked of both sexes together in a morning; thou female tongue-running, smile-smoothing, heart-opening, wink-tipping cordial, to whose glorious insipidity I owe the happiest moment of my life, let me fall prostrate thus, and adore thee.”

“It has been well said that tea is suggestive of a thousand wants, from which spring the decencies and luxuries of civilization.”

“Under certain circumstances there are few hours in life more agreeable than the hour dedicated to the ceremony known as afternoon tea.”

“Our trouble is that we drink too much tea. I see in this the slow revenge of the Orient, which has diverted the Yellow River down our throats.”

“Man should forget his anger before he lies down to sleep.”

“Thou hast the keys of Paradise, oh just, subtle, and mighty opium!”

“In many walks of life, a conscience is a more expensive encumbrance than a wife or a carriage.”

“Call for the grandest of all earthly spectacles, what is that? It is the sun going to his rest.”

“If once a man indulges himself in murder, very soon he comes to think little of robbing; and from robbing he comes next to drinking and Sabbath-breaking, and from that to incivility and procrastination.”

“Cows are amongst the gentlest of breathing creatures; none show more passionate tenderness to their young when deprived of them; and, in short, I am not ashamed to profess a deep love for these quiet creatures.”