“The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it.”
“If women were as fastidious as men, morally or physically, there would be an end of the race.”
“What is the matter with the poor is poverty; what is the matter with the rich is uselessness.”
“When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty.”
“The English have no respect for their language, and will not teach their children to speak it.”
“The savage bows down to idols of wood and stone: the civilized man to idols of flesh and blood.”
“A broken heart is a very pleasant complaint for a man in London if he has a comfortable income.”
“We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future.”
“There are two tragedies in life. One is not to get your heart's desire. The other is to get it.”
“He knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.”
“Better keep yourself clean and bright. You are the window through which you must see the world.”
“Whenever you wish to do anything against the law, Cicely, always consult a good solicitor first.”
“Power does not corrupt men; fools, however, if they get into a position of power, corrupt power.”
“You must not suppose, because I am a man of letters, that I never tried to earn an honest living.”
“Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.”
“Never waste jealousy on a real man: it is the imaginary man that supplants us all in the long run.”
“Marriage is popular because it combines the maximum of temptation with the maximum of opportunity.”
“If the announcer can produce the impression that he is a gentlemen, he may pronounce as he pleases.”
“What we want is to see the child in pursuit of knowledge, and not knowledge in pursuit of the child.”
“I never thought much of the courage of a lion tamer. Inside the cage he is at least safe from people.”
“We know there is intention and purpose in the universe, because there is intention and purpose in us.”
“If you value a man's regard, strive with him. As to liking, you like your newspaper -- and despise it.”
“Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.”
“The fickleness of the women I love is only equaled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me.”
“Revolutions have never lightened the burden of tyranny: they have only shifted it to another shoulder.”
“Englishmen hate Liberty and Equality too much to understand them. But every Englishman loves a pedigree.”
“Find enough clever things to say, and you're a Prime Minister; write them down and you're a Shakespeare.”
“Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh.”
“Beauty is all very well at first sight; but whoever looks at it when it has been in the house three days?”
“Give a man health and a course to steer; and he'll never stop to trouble about whether he's happy or not.”