Who said “I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.”?

“A New York divorce is in itself a diploma of virtue.”

“You know, that's the only good thing about divorce; you get to sleep with your mother.”

“France may claim the happiest marriages in the world, but the happiest divorces in the world are ''made in America.''”

“The possibility of divorce renders both marriage partners stricter in their observance of the duties they owe to each other. Divorces help to improve morals and to increase the population.”

“People named John and Mary never divorce. For better or for worse, in madness and in saneness, they seem bound together for eternity by their rudimentary nomenclature. They may loathe and despise one another, quarrel, weep, and commit mayhem, but they are not free to divorce. Tom, Dick, and Harry can go to Reno on a whim, but nothing short of death can separate John and Mary.”

“Husbands are like fires. They go out when unattended.”

“I never hate a man enough to give him his diamonds back.”

“A man in love is incomplete until he has married -- then he's finished.”

“Macho doesn't prove mucho.”

“You never really know a man until you have divorced him.”

“Conrad Hilton was very generous to me in the divorce settlement. He gave me 5, 000 Gideon Bibles.”